Why men and women from the former Soviet Union in immigration are often unable to arrange a personal life? Do Americans go crazy for Russian women, considering them the most beautiful and economical? American women do not marry “our” or “our” they are not married? Let’s try to sort out common stereotypes and to answer the simple question above — what is wrong with us?
Just say — what is written below, of course, does not apply to all Russian-speaking immediately, or specifically to the Russians, Ukrainians, Belarusians… Talking in General about those men and women who were born in the Soviet Union or the former Soviet Union, moved to some point in the United States and not can new home to arrange his personal life.
If you just take the bull by the horns and tell about the problem in General, it is that men and women in different ways to adapt to new conditions. Men often rush into one extreme — no change at all, not to become a spineless American, and to remain a true Russian man!
At the same time, women often talk in a different way — if we are to change. There I didn’t want Cinderella in a little over 30, and then the Princess won! I’m a hundred times more beautiful than any American woman, but also know how to cook, everything — I’m a star!
As a result, those and other the output is nonsense. But in fairness, women in the mass with these challenges better because the percentage of single among them is significantly lower than among men, because this text is focused more on men than women.
Men
Every time I hear about the differences of Americans and men from the former Soviet Union, very surprised. Because in 99% of cases I this difference tell those same immigrants from the Soviet Union, the comparison always comes out not in favor of immigrants from the United States.
“Our” and handy, and gentlemen, they are a bag to help carry, and get it fixed. “Our” give the woman forget that she is a woman, they will never allow her to pay for itself in the restaurant. Our resourceful and from nothing to build an outdoor shower and a greenhouse.
I’m afraid to disappoint anyone, but Americans are very handy. The United States is full of Lefties — they restore old cars, restore antique furniture, single-handedly built a beautiful house, they can be blacksmiths, jewelers, tailors, and so on. The difference is in the other — the Americans do not do everything because they need something to try and save money for the builders, not because they made the life and the soul. In everyday life, they can call an electrician to fix the simplest problem in the wiring, the reasoning is simple: this is not my area of expertise, why would I want to climb? And as a hobby to forge a rose out of metal.
Resourcefulness from the “necessity is the mother of invention” Americans simply don’t need. Not the level of life. Although American, the last school of the boy scouts, and even the odds to give the Russian city in terms of survival in the woods.
And about helping woman all is not so simple. Yes, they may not get up from his seat in the metro just because the woman in front of them, but any request for aid will respond always. The fact that in the United States, as in many Western countries, not every woman feels helpless, on the contrary, some may be indignant, if it will strongly help without asking. But because opened so tell me what you need help and you necessarily will help.
And generosity of the Americans cannot be questioned. Dating a woman pays for itself when talking about a business meeting, a partner partner.
By many indicators, Americans are not so far removed from Soviet men. There is a difference in one subtle detail that appears in childhood, but in the end leads to the fact that men of the USSR and the USA differ markedly from each other in adulthood. The fact that the American is the man who in his childhood could cry. He did not say — you’re a boy, but come on! or — boys don’t cry. If he felt bad, frustrated, if he was in distress (albeit for children, funny by adult standards), he cried like an ordinary person who became upset because boys and men have the right to feelings. Adult Americans are able to sympathize and empathize for this reason. That is why the Americans and homosexuals easier took. In their culture there is no machismo, the man there is the person who has the right not only on laughter and power, but also the tears, the man can also be vulnerable, sensitive and gentle — he’s human too.
The world of men post-Soviet space as if brutal. Oh, this is the famous — I am a man and it will be as I said. In the world of these men to weep. Men should be kept in feelings. There’s an intelligent boy with a violin armpit is not listed among the girls, but even yard bully like. By the way very strong men who go through life without a tear, much more likely to die, not having lived to 60, from a heart attack.
Immigration is the strong man sees the Americans, who, the following occurs: uh, no, says a former Soviet man, arrived in the U.S., so I’m less Mimsy-boys matuta as Americans, will not! Under the “less Mimsy-boys matuta” is it right to cry for joy and sorrow, and the alleged fact that American men are husbands-henpecked husbands, and fathers they are too soft and many others.Dr.
Only this fake brutality. After all, the same American man who’s not afraid to cry in public, not in need of him right after mom adopted wife. He leaves the parental home, not because married and moved to his wife, and because I grew up enough to rent her own apartment and to live separately from parents. With parents in the United States are extremely rare. As a rule, either it is religion and strict rules of the community (e.g., Orthodox Jews), or one who could not find themselves and succeed in life (rarely).
Looking ahead — the Soviet of the leaven of the woman often does not understand that will not keep the American husband some soup-cutlets and clean socks. All of this, the average American can perfectly take care of themselves. And here’s the most brutal Soviet man raised in the examples of machismo, he sees nothing wrong with serving women first mom, then someone else. On the contrary it allows them to feel even more macho. Moreover, in the world of fake brutality men allow themselves and think it’s normal that in the same America is not just unacceptable, and often criminal. For example, sex with a very drunk woman is not aware of what is happening, physical brutality, misunderstanding of the word “no” the first time, psychological pressure to achieve intimacy, ignoring the woman’s feelings… Like the skeletons gathering dust in a closet, perhaps, every man who grew up in the Soviet Union or the former Soviet Union. There is still considered that women love persistent, rude and even arrogant. There still it is believed that some violence is normal.
Very indicative in this sense, the example of the Russian TV series “Teacher”, excerpts from which I and see Facebook. In these passages the hero Nagieva certainly behaves like a “real man.” He’s rude, he tells the woman that she needs to do, he plugs her mouth, he decides for her… and Russian-speaking women in the comments thrilled with delight: that he’s a real man!!! Just did it without asking!
Translate these episodes of the Americans and Americans, and they freeze in horror. This type of behavior American men the most part outgrown. Today in American movies in General, the cult of respect for women. To the ridiculous: brutal gangster and killer ray Donovan from the same show talking with his wife and women with much more respect than a school teacher in the performance of Dmitry Nagiyev in the series Fizruk.
Thanks to this psevdoberemennost post-Soviet men still think housework is exclusively female. That’s the question — what American woman wants a husband who after work goes to relax on the sofa, demanding borscht, and forgetting that his wife also worked all day. Or a Russian man wants to marry a woman who does not think that is obliged to spend days and nights in the kitchen, because honey loves lunch and three course dinner each. By the way usually meets the first situation. Russian men are rejected by girls more often than reject them — the harsh prose of life, alas, but the US is better to be born a woman. And in the countries of the former Soviet Union just a man, after all, they are still there worn on the hands.
One conclusion — men from countries of the former USSR, if you want to find the other half must learn to cry, to respect the desire of women to empathize and sympathize. But can we learn this as adults — is a separate question. Re is a long-term relationship with American. But a rare Russian male last in society the average American even ten minutes.
Women
Our women are amazing. First, they sincerely believe that they are the most beautiful, kind and economic in any country in the world. But because the millionaires and princes with their hands blown off, to the heart prizhmut and will never let go. Second, when this happens, they genuinely indignant — how so? I take care of myself and can cook the same soup!
It is in the Western countries and European countries of post-Soviet women suddenly realize that they have prices, but really overestimate yourself. Very accurate this is one of my friends:
- They got the crown right out of his head begins to grow!
And it’s hard to disagree. “Our! women believe that if you learn to service a man at the household level, in the morning, lipstick and running to work in heels, I all — more than anything for a happy family life with an American and is not necessary. And because once she is a Princess-Princess and much better than some Americans, you can be a bitch. Many of the most confusing ridiculous myth that Slavic women are the most beautiful (and all American women are terrible and thick), and yet the alleged fact, that only a Russian (read, Russian) can be truly loyal to their husbands, while American women will certainly abandon them at the slightest problem, and I’m supposedly able to put up with the problems, and therefore indulge me, indulge! Can’t help but notice — American women are leaving those who have problems, and those who are immature and can not solve these problems. Therefore, the same Gogh he’s a gosh in the US would still be an angry loner, immature, a solution to the problem considers the bout. But in General, a native of the United States — beautiful wife and mother. Moreover, the average American which is softer treats its children than the same woman. She will never allow himself to yell at a child in public, especially slapping or dragging, twisting the arm.
But “our” ladies not to persuade. And, once in the US, they decide for their borscht and makeup at seven in the morning to all that receive less years in their countries. And from that very moment the crown was really starting to grow them directly out of my head.
- The Russian woman who has lived in the U.S. a little bit, a hundred times worse than any American feminists — once in a burst of revelation was told to me by a colleague. Such arrogance, such arrogance I haven’t seen there anybody.
Funny, but the fact is that the American series has long been not show Russian women as the apotheosis of wife and mother. In local movies, often prostitutes, or even more often — greedy persons who prey on residence permit in the USA (or green card). Yes, in real life Americans often not dream to marry a Russian beauty, and therefore hunting for them are not.
Our lady with crown of head on this and not suspects. First, a little looking around in the United States, she usually decides that the Americans she doesn’t really need. Well, all right — they’re not macho. None of them is that brutality, which for so are accustomed to at home, man this is not! Because the man in the understanding of women is often not the one who on weekends take the children out to the wife rested, and the one who is the very hero Nagieva say, as well, his mouth quickly closed and sat in the car! Again with the American absolutely nothing to talk about! Well, you — he and Dostoevsky in the original is not read, really in life does not suffer, then you have no strain, the same spirituality and at the same time drive with machismo. There is a solid fake politeness and humility. And our lady asked for a fight, rest her only dream. Her relationships often need a storm and the most brutal macho, who may be strongly pressed against the wall with the words “still you’re only mine!!!”. But here’s the hitch — the one who is strong hand pressed to the wall, hopelessly accustomed to, he’s the Prince, he is the king and the navel of the earth. Why would he a Princess? He came from a country where the owners of the pants in high esteem only by birth man. Not a secret that in the post-Soviet space of any even the most zavladenie the man pick up and heat. Men there is no need to worry about the fact that they’re married, women are worried — whether you take them in the sacred marriage. In the republics of the former USSR women are still afraid of loneliness, not seeing it as freedom. Married at any cost is the most important task of any.
And here on the American space meet these two alone — a man who doesn’t want to change, and the woman who decided that for the rest of our lives with such data like patties and the ability to run in heels should be on hand. Macho comes to the horror of the Princess, and Vice versa. Do I need to clarify that such relationships tend to burn out quickly. And then our unhappy post-Soviet woman begins to literally rush on the American space — American, she lacks the strength and brutality “we” are too harsh and do not appreciate. It would be the same mix, “our”, but after a few years of marriage with an American. But you try find these.
In General, well, those that these. But there is one conclusion — the need to change, to adapt to new life circumstances, to grow, to develop, and not be mad that you underestimated. The surrounding is not exactly to blame for the problems allegedly allegedly macho and princesses.
